Lessons from a Threesome, July 28, 2018

Sexy Video and verse of hidden & forbidden Hawaii since 2001

Caroleena was a working girl who was very good at separating her mind from her body. She could engage in physical activities with a client without the physical sensations that ordinarily accompany sex. It was easier not to feel anything to keep her soul safe. Caroleena worried that if she met someone she wanted to be with she might forget how to locate the “on” switch. When she met a client who turned into a friend who turned into…a sexual relationship she did not know how to label. He was not really a boyfriend because, for one thing, he had a sexual interest in the same gender. Caroleena asked around and found out very many men have same sex encounters on the down low. She decided to take a chance and try to satisfy his desires. She met a couple who proposed a threesome and Caroleena had the creative idea…

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A Whore and a Slut are Not the Same at All–February 24, 2019

It is so funny to me when women are afraid to leave their men in my presence. Like I am going to jump on any man within pouncing business. As if I want every guy for myself. Far from it. No need for women to glare at me with suspicious eyes. I didn’t think about men outside of business. Spending time with men was not leisure time. An associate (can’t use the word friend in the dope world) of mine described the lack of interest in normal sex typical of prostitutes best: “hookers are like virgins, strippers are sluts.”

I have never been a stripper, I am far too uncomfortable even attempting to dance. In fact anyone who has had the misfortune of seeing my attempt to move gracefully to music has nodded knowingly and said something along the lines of “yes, your mother definitely was white.” So I cannot say that I know how strippers treat men in their personal lives but I can speak of the working girls I have spoken to and they are like me. We develop a real aversion to men. We need them because we like/need the money, and we can’t/won’t work a regular job, but we hate them. We never got into the profession for the sex but for the drugs. We don’t want to touch these strangers, and we really don’t want to touch them once we get to know them and their ceaseless demands that do not take into account anything we want to do. When we stay with men, which we often do because in outrageously expensive Honolulu there is no way to get a cheap place short term . And it’s not like women ever join together to go in on a place as a group. God forbid women should ever work together to help each other. But I digress. We stay with guys and even if we pay them money or dope, they end up wanting sex. In spite of the fact that they have always been gay as far as we knew, they end up wanting sex. We want to come home and be left alone, physically, and we know we won’t get any peace when we see porn playing. Yes, men put on porn in the background and watch it with other guys like it is the news, so it is normal to casually watch porn if you are a guy, I guess. But when he has the porn on so that we see it playing we get the hint and the sight of porn in the place we wish to call home is a disaster. Inevitably he will decide that whatever he had received was not enough and he was going to get some other girl and lie to her about giving her a place to come home and relax. I remember one woman saying to me: “I hate them. They say they want to please me. Then leave me alone and I will do me!”

I had nodded in agreement. I once told a guy that if he was as concerned about my pleasure as he claimed to be he would do me the service of ironing for me. To his credit, he actually did iron. Didn’t get him what he wanted because he was broke, but I liked to imagine that he had a rich sense of humor. Probably not, he was probably just pursuing an angle. Yes, I detect the bitterness in my tone. I had gotten so fed up with the position I had put myself in that I was offended by any man who wanted to have sex with me. Not to mention the inconvenience of taking my time away from what I really wanted to do. I was all happy to be friends with the guy but when it came out that he had a sexual interest I lost all respect. Pretty ironic but there it is. Another new norm for the addicted sex worker.

Sexual interest infuriated me. Even when I was getting paid it was very difficult for me to feign politeness. I was angry at myself too, but I had enough anger to go around and share some with him.

Once a husband who never mentioned that he was a husband saw his wife approaching on a bike. Bikes are a common method of transportation among “chronics” as habitual users who make drugs a way of life are called. She was angry of course, but not at the person who was committed to her but at me. She demanded to know if I had given him any money. I had to laugh as I informed her that giving men money was against my business plan

Hooker with a Degree in One Hand and a Rap Sheet in the Other

Sexy Video and verse of hidden & forbidden Hawaii since 2001

Hooker with a Degree in One Hand and a Rap Sheet in the Other

July 14, 2018

I have a morbid sense of humor. I find amusement in things that others might find depressing, upsetting, mean…you get the picture. This trait is called “gallows humor.” Yes, I can laugh at the fact that somehow my ivy league alma mater got ahold of my prison address and sent the alumni magazine to the Women’s Community Correctional Center in Kailua on the island of Oahu, state of Hawaii. I had to chuckle at the thought of the alumni affairs office rushing the magazine to me since I was valued as a graduate, only to have the magazine sit in the mail room because inmate desires were low priority. “Next time no come jail,” the ACO (Adult Correctional Officer) snapped at me in Hawaii’s colloquial dialect, called pidgin, when I asked about the…

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Adult web site hooker reviews & the N.Y. Times: Twins?

Sexy Video and verse of hidden & forbidden Hawaii since 2001

What does the New York Times have in common with an adult web site that posts anonymous reviews of providers? Sadly, these sources of info/opinions/fantasy (??) have a lot in common now that the New York Times has published an anonymous negative opinion piece about a prominent leader. In both cases we know the authors do not want to identify themselves. Yet the authors do not use the cloak of anonymity to specify exactly what we have to fear from the objects of scorn. We could juxtapose the reviews but we won’t due to copyright laws. If we did we would see the ugly insults but no foundation of factual evidence. We should just take the authors at their words that the hated ones are bad for reasons known only to them. Since unsupported anonymously written negative reviews accomplish nothing but fury, maybe the motives are not what they seem…

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People say the strangest things about hookers. Here’s an example.

Sexy Video and verse of hidden & forbidden Hawaii since 2001

Recently, I was reading a popular adult services web site which posts reviews about providers. The reviews are supposed to be from clients and I think they usually are.  Of course you never know if a good review is from someone who really likes a girl he has never even met but wants to give her some good press based on his fantasies. Or maybe a bad review was written by someone with an ax to grind (ironically, I had problems with people I would not engage intimately.  They did not have enough money.  I knew that because there is not enough money.  But I digress).  I find the site fascinating, not just because it appeals to the egomaniac in me, although it is a terrifying and wonderful thing to see your name in print, well sort of.  Not the same as having your name on that banner of lights…

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I had a pimp but I did not know it

Sexy Video and verse of hidden & forbidden Hawaii since 2001


IMG_20170626_214856.pngIn 2002 I was addicted to crack cocaine and turned to hooking on the streets of downtown Honolulu to support my habit. I was not one of the expensive streetwalkers who strolled Kuhio Avenue in Waikiki wearing platform shoes with the fake fish appearing to swim in glass heels. These women were usually young, attractive under lots of make up, often walked in pairs, and came out at night. They dressed like hookers on tv, which was my only frame of reference. The women did not appear to mind that their mission was easy to guess. Truth in advertising must have worked well because they were out every night. Their activities were closely monitored by black men, also young, who sat in luxury cars parked on the side streets like Lewers or Beachwalk. These young black men approached any woman they noticed who watched, not where she was going, but…

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Remember the Blog I Wrote About Client who liked to watch me take IQ tests? Here’s a Great Example of How “Sexy” Varies

Sexy Video and verse of hidden & forbidden Hawaii since 2001

This viral math question has two solutions.

This viral math question has two solutions.
There are two correct answers.
 Tomasina DiMatteo/Facebook

Spotted on The Daily Mail, the question was originally created by Go Tumble and shared on Wikr before taking off on Facebook and going viral.

There are two correct ways to solve it. The first way to find the solution is to add the equation, then combine the sum with that of the previous equation. The second solution involves multiplying the second number of the equation by the number you are adding to it. The correct answer could either be 40 or 96.

Your experience may vary, that is one of the phrases often used on the site that introduced me to internet adult entertainment and reviews of said entertainers, including my former self.  What works for one person may not for another.  Common sense really, but common sense isn’t so common.  You…

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