I AM THINKING A LOT ABOUT LIARS–and the different forms of lies

HOW IS THIS EXCUSE COMFORTING?

“Don’t worry, I haven’t forgotten about you,”

–a guy told me today after I waited in vain for him to make good on a promise he had earnestly delivered.


Am I supposed to feel better knowing that I hadn’t been forgotten? To me, it is worse knowing that the person is well aware of his obligations but simply does not bother fulfilling them. There is a deeper truth to being remembered an ignored. At least if I had been forgotten, well, I could believe that the person did care in his heart of hearts. Forgetting a commitment might be entirely innocent, unless you are one of those people who believes that there are no such things as accidents–if you step on someone’s foot, lose a phone number, or forget a promise, such things are always done subconsciously, on purpose. To remember what you are supposed to do for someone but just not do it for no good reason–now that is disheartening.

I am right in the center of your mind’s eye, but you can easily look away from thoughts of me with a flippant, “I haven’t forgotten you!”

I haven’t forgotten you. You are on my mind. I simply do not care. Thinking of you does not motivate me.”

–The real truth behind a common excuse made by people who fail to keep their commitments.

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